Protecting The Free World One Green Army Man At A Time

One of the main ways I kept myself occupied during summer vacation was to pull out my little green army men.  I’d take them out in the backyard and take over a lightly planted flower bed and begin my work.  The first step was to lay out the scenario of the battle.  If it was a beach landing I grabbed the hose and a little bit of plastic sheeting but usually it was just bunker and trench warfare.  I would grab my mom’s small gardening tools and like any good soldier begin to dig in.  Trenches came first then holes for the bunkers which would be covered with some sticks, grass and dirt.  Those brave little green men would then be placed in strategic locations not knowing what awaited them.  This was scorched earth, shock and awe, take no prisoners war.  After all the men were placed in position I’d pull out the weaponry.  First came the sniper, a Daisy BB gun from a good distance away.  I’d go for the easiest targets first; the minesweepers and the mortar guys, then go for the radiomen.  Any soldier knows you need to take out their ability to communicate.  Next came the artillery barrage, a few Black Cat firecrackers would take out some of the guys in the trenches. 

Those shellshocked soldiers were then easy prey as I moved in closer with the awesome power of the Daisy.  Mine came equipped with an interesting feature, you always had to aim a couple inches to the left of whatever you were aiming at. (I did step up to the Crossman pump which sadly I used to put a pellet right between the eyes of my Nazi GI Joe, the one with the blond fuzzy hair and scar on the cheek.)  

After taking out most of the kneeling shooters I would move in for hand to hand combat, a quick flick of the finger was all it took to wipe out those little green guys.  Lastly would be the planting of explosive charges inside the bunkers.  I gave them fair warning, they had the opportunity to come out and I might have spared their little green lives but they chose to hunker down.  A well placed Black Cat took care of the last holdouts and rumbled the earth with it’s awesome power.

After some quick C-rations (usually a peanut butter and jelly sandwich) it was off to fight the next battle!  

I think I have a great idea for an awesome Christmas present for some good character building activity with my grandson.  Prepare to hit the beach!

Tags: BB gun, Black Cat, Christmas, grandson, green army men, My Life